pandora's box
I applaud your efforts but your buffed out devil mascot seems to rather invite meth use. I have a story to share. It's a sad one but 100% true...Pandora’s Box.
I tried Tina for the first time with a fuck buddy. I knew he used it and I wanted to try it myself. I am an overly educated, professional guy and had never used drugs in my life up to that point. My 15-year relationship had just ended very unexpectedly. My life was built around this relationship, which had started when I was 21 years old.
Without the relationship, I was adrift and nothing really mattered any more. I did not know Tina was just another name for methamphetamine. It was such a cute name; I didn't really think it could do me any harm.
I tried it and we had sex all night long. I ended up doing a fairly large amount, mainly because I didn't know what I was doing and my friend was too fucked up to provide any useful advice. I went back to my place the next morning still very high. That evening I fell asleep and awoke the next morning feeling extremely depressed. One sentence was looping over and over in my mind; "Kill yourself! Kill yourself! Kill yourself!" I couldn't stop the message echoing in my brain. It was then I remembered my ex partner kept a gun in the house. When I picked it up I remember smiling in a mad, elated way. I felt so powerful. The gun felt so right in my hands. I quickly wrote a suicide note and crawled into the bathtub. I had the gun in my mouth and was pulling back on the trigger.
In a moment of clarity, just before pulling the trigger, I realized that seeing my brains blasted all over the bathroom would probably profoundly traumatize the person who found me. I was able to call 911 and the cops came and took me to the hospital. I spent 5 days on a psych ward. The first two days there I searched ceaselessly for a way to hang myself. On the fourth day, the crash was more or less over and I felt fine. The story sounds made up, and I wish it were. The really scary part is that, even after this experience, I used Tina again last week. Crystal is a Pandora's box that I wish I had never opened. Whoever said, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger," never played around with Tina.